During the third week of July, I attended my second aquatic session sans the Oompa Loompa bathing suit wherein my skirt kept filling up like a balloon no matter what exercise I did. Instead, I decided to wear the two piece tank top styled suit. Our trainer, Nick, started us off on the deck of the pool warming up. Leg lifts, stretches, squats and marching. Everything was going well until he told us to do 25 jumping jacks. I have finally gotten to the point where I can do about 15 jumping jacks before stopping and I’m pretty proud of that fact, but unfortunately, Nick did not realize that you do not make an obese old lady with a large chest, do jumping jacks in a bathing suit! My best friend and I looked at each other and laughed. We need our sports bras! Of course, being women, we improvised and criss-crossed our arms over our chest and did half jumping jacks.
Next we were instructed to get into the pool and upon entering the water, no balloon effect so my confidence grew. Nick stood on the deck of the pool and began. He instructed us first to do some knee lifts, etc. Once we were warmed up, he started the heavier aerobics and we were instructed to jog in the pool. I began a good jog only to panic. What was happening? I felt something really weird. Was it the balloon effect again? It couldn’t be. I was having some sort of bathing suit malfunction again. No, it wasn’t Oompa Loompa Syndrome; it was the dreaded Droopy Drawer Syndrome. As I jogged, my bathing suit top rode up and my bottoms fell down. I kept trying to jog and hold my shirt down and my pants on for dear life. At one point, I knew my entire torso was showing. Although this was underwater, I furiously yanked at my suit as I could just imagine what was visible from the deck of the pool. I am sure that the shock of all that white meat of my body being exposed, and there was a lot of it, blinded our morning lifeguards, Lauren DeBow and Candice Ray! I silently prayed that they would not stare too closely. Lauren and Candice have always been very supportive of my efforts even though they really don’t know me as well as the trainers. I am just thankful that they didn’t fall off the lifeguard stand laughing! I finished the class hanging on for dear life to the two parts of my bathing suit. This bathing suit was far worse than the Oompa Loompa suit!
The next day we had a weigh-in and a healthy cooking class given by Oshun, one of our trainers who is a healthy cooking chef. I knew the scales would not be in my favor after just coming back from two weeks on vacation. When I weighed in at the beginning of this session, the scales were at 280. I dreaded weigh-in this time but as my trainers, Rambo Rico and Nestor the Youngster, stood by, I stepped up on the scale. I just could not believe my eyes. The number climbed. Rico took the weight from the 250 mark and moved it to the 300 mark and the scale still did not balance. I know that rhubarb pie I had on vacation was not that fattening. What could be wrong? I could feel the red from embarrassment flowing into my cheeks. Don’t cry! Don’t sweat! According to the scale, I was weighing in at over 320 pounds. Can I hold back the tears much longer? This can’t be! Rico told me to step off so they could reset the scale. Again I stepped on and the numbers climbed to 330! Just as I was ready to cry, Rico started laughing. I didn’t know what was going on. Evidently Nasty Nestor had cleverly put his foot on the back of the scale while I was weighing in! Don’t they know they can give an old lady a heart attack? It was then that my boxing skills came into play and I pulled back and landed a good one on Nestor’s arm. I hope it hurt! Bottom line, I was up four pounds on the scale to 284 which isn’t good but I was sort of happy with that number after spending two weeks on vacation.
After the fright of weigh-in, I moved on to the healthy cooking class. I have attended several of Oshun’s workshops and each one presents new and interesting ideas. This workshop was nice as we had a very diverse group and the workshop was well attended. We sampled salsa, chutney, soy beans, chicken, dragon fruit, brown rice and much more. She made us try things we have never eaten in our lives and I was proud of myself that I didn’t die trying! Oshun stressed that we were all so much healthier when everyone cooked at home instead of indulging in fast food and we all know she is correct. Everyone went home with their bellies full and a lot more knowledge about the foods we eat.
After this week, I realized several things. The most obvious thing I learned is that although white meat is good for you, I am going to water test next week’s bathing suit so I don’t show all of mine! Will I ever have a normal day in the pool without bathing suit malfunctions? The second thing that was reinforced was the fact that the food I had ingested has resulted in pounds. I realized that I was on vacation however; I have become sloppy about what I am putting in my mouth. Because of the exercising, you may say that I have even become cocky about it and have been eating things or eating quantities that I know I should not be eating. It is time to get strict as exercising will not work without curtailing my food intake. Finally, I couldn’t be mad at Nestor or Rico for their prank because they did something I would have done. I love those guys and keep telling them that they should just admit that they love me because admitting it is half the battle!
I am a recruit in the YMCA Boot Camp and I know that even with wearing a malfunctioning bathing suit and scaring the trainers and lifeguards, I just might deserve to be there! Even more importantly, I am a recruit in the YMCA Boot Camp and I know for a fact that because of my eating habits, I NEED TO BE THERE!