Wednesday, April 30, 2008


So far my journey is going well. I am still hearing from many regarding my public admission of obesity and actually...I'm still shocked that so many have responded so positively. I received a beautiful text message from my son's girlfriend and messages from people I never thought would take the time to respond and that really touched me.

I had a proud moment yesterday. I left work and went home saying I would walk at home as my boss wasn't walking today due to a commitment and it looked like rain. I got home, sat down on the couch and told myself....forget it...I walked yesterday...I'll wait until tomorrow. innerself decided I should get my fat rump off the couch and go walk so I went to our back garage to the treadmill and proceeded to start walking. At first I said to myself that I would only do 1/2 of of three miles but as it ended up, I persevered and walked over three miles in 60 minutes at a very sturdy pace. As I finished, I realized that my shirt was soaking wet! That is a first for me!!!

I felt proud and good about myself for not listening to my lazy side.

Monday, April 28, 2008


Today is one week since I weighed myself and began my journey trying to escape obesity. I have kept on task and walking up to 3 miles. Yesterday I actually biked for the first time in ages. Of course, my hiney hurts from the seat but hopefully that will get better.

I attended my niece's First Communion after which a breakfast was held. I passed up the pancakes, waffles and arepas (a Colombian dish for my gringo friends) and ate 1/2 a bagel with fat free cream cheese, fruit, one mini quiche (usually I have about 10) and my one item to splurge on.....a piece of morsilla (sp?) which is a Colombian blood sausage. Of course...this meal was breakfast and lunch so I think I did well.

I did have 2 glasses of Schnebly's mango wine during the week but I counted my points for them.

WHAT DID THE SCALE SAY THIS MORNING??????????????????????????????


DRUMROLL HERE................


Saturday, April 26, 2008

Goal Number One

Announcing Goal Number One!

In any weight loss plan they say to set reasonable short term goals. I am ready to do so. Here it is....

My neice, Colette, husband Charlie, son Cade and my brother Robert are coming to visit on May 17th. My goal is to lose 10 to 15 pounds by the time they arrive.

Repercussions of my Revelation

When I had previously posted the story below on another blog, I was worried as to what type of response I would get. I had a feeling that some may chastise me for putting myself out there to be hurt if I failed. I am here to tell you that I was so wrong.

I am truly humbled by the response of family and friends to my plan to blog about my obesity. Several of you have posted on the story below on my other blog and many of you have e-mailed me privately. You have made me feel so loved and cared for. Each and every one of you encouraged me to start my journey and follow through.

One of my friends told his girlfriend about my story. Today she showed up at my office door offering to do a water aerobics class for me. I have always wanted to try this but the classes never fit my schedule. Next Saturday at 7 a.m., we will begin at her house. I held myself together until she left my office and then I went for a walk and cried. I am overwhelmed that someone would take time for me! Me! Someone is taking time for me! Why does that sound so strange to me?

On Monday I will weigh in and post as to my loss or gain. I feel that I have had a good week food wise. Here is my week so far:
  • I stayed within my point target and ate very healthy.
  • I did not starve myself at all.
  • I walked Monday for 2 miles
  • I walked Tuesday for 2.5 miles
  • Walked Thursday for 2.5 miles
  • Walked today for 3 miles

Comming Clean

Written on 4-22-08
Can I Commit?
How Strong am I?

Today I made a decision that was extremely hard for me. I am going public with my weight issue. It may end up to be the most embarassing thing in my life or my most inspirational. My hopes and prayers are that it will help me to be commited to taking time for myself. A woman is made by God and fine tuned to be caring and nuturing creatures. It is one of our biggest faults. I don't think God meant for us to put everyone before ourselves, but we have. I can remember thinking in August of 1992 as Hurricane Andrew raged around my family as we sat huddled in the hallway that I just couldn't protect my children or promise that they would be safe from the storm. I remember crying hysterically and praying for my daughter, Jessie who was in the Bahamas. I thought if we were getting this bad of a storm here, she surely could not survive the storm on a small island. I really didn't think about thoughts were for my children.
My husband has often said to me that I need to take time for myself. I can wait no longer. I want to be able to get on the floor and play with my Grandson, Alex. I want to see my daughter Jessie and son Danny marry and have children. I want to grow old with my husband.

Growing up in a small town in Pa., some of my earliest memories are of being teased by my older brothers. They called me "Fat Sissy." Sissy is the name that those near and dear to me have called me since I was born and I prefer it over Doris. Just not the "fat" part. During my youth, I was always the chubby kid. I love to sing as a teenager and I'll never forget a teacher who told me that "fat people can't sing." I was crushed as I loved music. Oh...I had many friends and dates due to the fact that I had, what I considered, a great personality in face of adversity.

Throughout my adult life, I have gone up and down with my weight. The only time I was near successful was when I was on different drugs from a doctor. The minute I went off of them, I gained back the weight and more. My weight has always been a source of failure for me and it truly does affect my feeling of self worth. I guess society has not helped with that feeling. People feel that fat people are lazy, sloppy and unworthy of love. Many people act like fat people don't have feelings. Well...I am here to tell you that we do. I cry often and my feelings do get hurt a lot!

During this past weekend I faced the scale and was not happy. This 53 year old woman is too close to somewhere I swore I would never be. Yes...I'm too embarassed to mention the number. Maybe someday. (Note...the picture above is from a fashion show at church this past Saturday where I was the emcee.) have to understand that my husband is very fit and even plays raquetball three times a week. I, on the other hand, find it difficult to make time for exercising or taking time for myself. I do believe that I am a little afraid of exercise because I have suffered a broken leg that required surgery as well as a ruptured ACL ligament that I had to have a cadaver ligament implanted in my knee. I will say that even though I am fat...o.k...the word is obese and I admit I am...., the only medication I take is synthroid for an underactive thyroid....but I cannot blame my weight on that!

On Monday morning I went into the office and told my boss, who is also heavy and a good friend, that this was it. We both had to buckle down and it is easier when you have a friend to do it with. We committed to start walking and eating better.

My week so far has been pretty good. I attended a farewell party and also had an office luncheon and feel that I did well. I am more or less following the Weight Watchers plan. I have surprised myself by walking on Monday, Tuesday and today for a total of 2 to 2.5 miles a day. I feel good and yes...I have had some hunger. I still have not been able to drink a lot of water but I am working on it.

I am hoping to post here at least once a week to update you as to my progress. I will be truthful and honest about my feelings and my failures and successes. I hope you will support me with your prayers and emotional support because Lord knows...I need it. Feel free to post a comment below.

Until we meet again...............................